Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Hurricane season almost over


In certain circles the end of the year is referred to as "hurricane season" because of the triple threat of Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year's Eve. There's all the stress of family obligations, relationship struggles, financial worries, travel, friends, parties...all these expectations of it being all warm, loving, happy and joyous when in reality it's a hellish time of year. Everyone feels it but it's especially hard on people trying to stay away from alcohol and drugs. I went to a party on Christmas eve and the hostess' sister and bro-in-law got stumbling drunk on wine and then proceeded to drive their two cars home with their two young children in tow. I was horrified. I managed to say something quietly to the host who got them to hang around another hour or so and drink some coffee but they were in NO SHAPE to be driving anywhere, much less on Christmas eve with their kids. What do you do? I felt bad about it for so many reasons. Who am I to point fingers after all the drunken miles I logged? They're not MY family or MY kids...but if anything had happened how would I live with myself? Would saying "Well, I tried." really cut it? I think not. And if I had caused a scene? Would my friends really be asking me back to their family celebrations? Should I just have stayed home and denied myself their company knowing alcohol as involved? Life was much simpler when I didn't give a shit about anyone but myself. How the heck did I wind up trying to arbitrate moral dilemma? It's a party. People get drunk and then drive home, right? Drat. In no way am I immune from these predations. MANY times in the last 30 days I have been sorely tempted to tie one on but with the help of God and good friends I've managed to hold the beast at bay. I've been thinking about smoking a joint with the idea is that it would be enjoyable but the reality is I haven't smoked AT ALL since July. Drawing hot smoke into my lungs would be painful and I'd cough and choke and it would make my throat sore. In all likelihood I'd get sick from it. And then there's the feeling of being so-called "high". Ugh. I vividly remember the sensation last time and how much I hated every second of it and couldn't wait to come down. Apparently my career as a drunkard and a druggie is effectively over. Thank God! I can't wait for New Year's Eve to be done with so I can get back on my diet and back to the daily gym routine. I hope y'all had a very merry Christmas. Despite my whining all of my family and travel stress was really at a minimum and things went fine.

2 comments:

lime said...

well, to tell the truth i have created a scene with both my dad and my FIL over drunk driving. my MIL got angrier about things than my FIL....she had a son lay in a coma for 15 yrs because a drunk driver ran over him...you'd think SHE of all people would be opposed to anyone impaired getting behind the car. well it made me persona nongrata but i don't care.

anyway, glad that the holiday has been mostly a good time and relatively stress-free....a few more days and the new year is past...hang in there.

jillie said...

Well, it's really hard to pick only one as a favorite and hats off to you for a job well done on your clean living. I wish my brother could do the same :o(

Anyway....HHNT and Happy New Year to you!!

xo