Mania 101 HNT

Frantic Mania. FAIL. I'm pissed, I hate the world and I want to drink. I'm tired of being Mr. Fucking Nice Guy. Whatever, so after getting all my credit card statements together to plan out how to transfer my balances so I pay no interest while I pay off $10,000 in debt instead I went guitar shopping online and bought another Stratocaster. Don't chide me. I was going to buy TWO strats AND two Les Pauls (one in black, one in white, both with gold hardware). Meanwhile I have only two tentative gigs Gearjammers gigs over the next two months AND we haven't rehearsed, nor have I practiced or even played more than a minute or two in weeks. Yet here I am taking arty guitar shots and venting to the web about my insanity. Nevermind that I'm booked to play with another band every Saturday night in the city. I need to pray a whole lot more and cry a whole lot less. My life is candy and cookies right now. I'm just unhappy because I want a full time lover who makes me feel like a man. Yes, I know the fact that I feel like I need someone else to complete me means I'm totally fucking broken. So what? Shut the fuck up! Truth be told if I had what I claim to want so much I'd probably be ignoring her except for the sex while I happily went on my way doing all the shit I do for which there isn't enough time in the day as it is. Fuck's sake. Has anyone got a valium? The lack of sugar and carbs to offset the caffeine is making me, well, crazy. So I give you this lame shot because I'm still too flabby to take a real one. Fear not. When I have abs of steel to match my buns I promise the goods will be forthcoming. You're all very patient with me and I love you all for your emails and comments of support. I'm not always this insane, I swear. Um...am I? Oh. Uh...well anyway, HHNT.